Intimacy​ - Book Review: The New Male Sexuality by Bernie Zilbergeld, Ph.D.

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So I had time and picked up The New Male Sexuality by Bernie Zilbergeld, Ph.D., and started it again. I just wanted to share with you guys an interesting point he made that I wanted to share. He has a chapter on ten myths about the “Fantasy Model of Sex” Number eight is that sex equals intercourse.

He presents the viewpoint that traditional sex does not have to be the ultimate goal. That rather a moment of intimacy can also mean merely pleasing your partner and helping them become turned on through kissing, caressing manually or oral stimulation. That is counter to the common belief that there is no standard or a natural way something should proceed in the bedroom. Also, we should be comfortable experimenting with many different ways to help turn each other on.

He then shared a detailed list of ways to share intimacy with another person that isn’t just intercourse. I agree with his viewpoint that pleasure shouldn’t be limited to a tiny portion of one's anatomy. Instead we should invest time in exploring and experimenting with each other's bodies.

*Flirting with a partner although we both know nothing physical could occur right then.

*Dirty dancing together.

*Kissing and hugging well still partially clothed to create added suspense like as teenagers.

*You are masturbating while your partner touches and kisses you.

*Keeping foreplay as the main course for pleasuring each other.

*Taking turns pleasing each other in foreplay or sex.

*Whispering a fantasy into your partner’s ear well they masturbate.

I’m excited to try these would you be interred in any of the above?